Well it’s been two months since I was here! I didn’t anticipate being away that long. I do have a New Deck Interview to write up for the Fat Folks Tarot but I have to admit not a lot has been happening on the Tarot front. Partly it’s because I’ve been busy getting my crochet business out there, plus I’ve started a little part-time admin job from home, but if I’m honest I also lost my way somewhat. One reason for that is to do with the main subject of this post, which I’ll go into shortly, but the other was social media fatigue. Instagram was just oversaturating my mind with other people’s Tarot stuff. On Saturday I was fortunate to finally attend a group Professional Tarot Supervision session with Katrina Wynne and it was just the refreshing wave of reconnection I needed. I realised that I need to get back into depth spaces, rather than spend lots of time scrolling through other people’s stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I learn a lot from Instagram and I will continue to do so, but I need the deeper, slower connections. And I realised that it isn’t the right place for me to seek clients. In fact as a general rule, I’m much better off focusing my time and energy on the blog, on reading deeply, on journaling and working with the cards and sharing my learnings. This is what I get energy from and I believe through that clients who need what I can offer will come. There are quieter, slower ways to seek clients that feel more meaningful for me, and I think part of that is focusing my energy in certain places.
But let me not forget the main purpose of this post, though it has mutated as so often my posts do! For six months of this year, I was doing a daily journal with The Wildwood Tarot as part of doing the Professional Tarot Counselling course. If I’m honest, it was more like five months because I fell off the wagon big time in the last month. I just lost all motivation and interest. For ages I kept telling myself I would catch up with the days I hadn’t completed – I always pulled a card just didn’t do the rest – and eventually I managed to do some but it was hanging like doom over me. So much so that it was preventing me from doing anything else Tarot because I felt like I had to complete this before I could move on to doing any other learning or reading. I had been doing the Year in Wildwood study on Facebook but that got set aside long before. And then one day I just gave myself permission to let go. There’s a part of me that is sad that the journals aren’t quite complete but there is also relief. I thought I would get straight back to the Year in the Wildwood study instead, but no, my mojo was lost in the wood. Turns out I really needed a break.
Would I recommend doing six months journaling with the same Tarot deck? Yes but maybe don’t do it like me. Katrina’s approach is less complicated and intense than I decided to make it. I decided early on that I didn’t want to just stick with writing my impressions, and knowledge and what showed up in the day. Instead once I’d done one page per card on that, I then went on the next time it showed up to write up the equivalent-ish knowledge from Rider-Waite (I say -ish because they don’t totally map on to each other), and then after that each time I would choose a different exercise from Mary Greer’s excellent 21 ways to read a Tarot Card, so e.g. recording the emotions of the card, the numerology, the elements, writing it as a story. These were fantastic exercises to do and I got a lot from them but I was making life hard for myself by demanding so much thought and energy every day. No wonder things fell apart. My journals though are now a great resource and fun to read through too. I love that I created them with scrap paper. They feel as organic as the process I went through.
At this time I am feeling ready to dip back into some regular Tarot study but my brain goes into startled rabbit mode every time I imagine myself doing it, which rather suggests that there’s still some unwinding to do. I am intending to do the Professional Tarot Counselling course – part 2 in January and have already bought a couple of the units to study before it starts, so maybe I’ll just let that be enough for now. That and getting the cards out and reading with them for myself and others, and spending time in places that bring me energy around Tarot rather than drain it.
Next time I promise I’ll share the Fat Folks Tarot New Deck Interview Spread I did.